Well, I went back to the doctor today. I thought for sure he’d say something to me about showing up a day earlier than the appointment date. But he didn’t say a word. He did act very nervous, though. I told the doctor I was under a lot of stress. He asked me what the stress is about. I said I would tell him, but he would think I’m crazy. He said he would think no such thing. People always say that. That they’ll believe whatever I tell them, and once they hear what I’m telling them, they get quiet and tell me that no such thing is happening to me. I figure he’d be the same way. I told him that I really could use someone to talk with, but I haven’t found someone I can really trust. He’ s very patient with me every time I go see him, but I can feel his tension. I think it’s because he knows and probably wants to talk to me about what is happening, but doesn’t dare broach the subject. Maybe he would turn out to be a good guy, but so far, I haven’t run into any of them. I like him.
But as usual when I visit his office, all the lowlifes act like a bunch of hoodlums. When I stepped into the waiting room, all of them turned to look at me and acted as if I had two eyes on my forehead. I got angry and asked them, “What are you looking at?” All of them turned around in unison. I’m sick of being looked at in such a way that makes me feel that I’m some out of space creäture. Now I know how fish must feel being in a fish bowl all day, or how a movie star feels when her fans can’t get enough of her. I can tell you one thing, I would never want to be a movie star. It’s a disgusting feeling being in a fish bowl. I’m sure you targets all know the feeling. You can’ just walk by anonymously without someone being at your back or doing something, or laughing loudly when you pass by, or doing any number of things to annoy you. You want to pass by and be left alone. But no such luck with us targets. Always some lowlife trying to make our life a living hell.
But, otherwise , the doctor visit went well. I only wish I could trust him.
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